So, in one week I will hold you for the first time. I can not even begin to tell you how that makes me feel. I am excited, scared, anxious, sad, overflowing with love, and so much more! I have been told many times to be prepared for you to be upset, to be sad, to be nervous. I am okay with these emotions. You will not know me, will not trust me, will not want me, will not love me. I am okay! I know that in time all these things will come. I know that one day we will share stories about your reactions and feelings and marvel at how far we have come.
What I want you to know, I love you. I will not leave you, I will hold you and cry with you and laugh with you. I will wait for you to know me and trust me. I will wait!
I will pray with you for the parents that made that first hard choice. That knew you and loved you enough to give you life. I will mourn with you for them every time you ask why or how. I will do my best to explain and help you understand.
I will, most importantly, do all I can to show you Christ. He and only He can fill the holes and emptiness that I'm sure you will experience. His love is everything, it is all you need. Without Him we are and have nothing. He will love you, He will mourn with/for you, He will pursue you, He will wait for you; and He'll do these things SO much better than I will!
Jadyn Grace, I can not wait until next week when I will see your precious face and hold your precious hands!
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